Being selfless is the gateway to selfish ?

Number of quotes like below pass through us every now and then…

“The first secret to happiness is to fall in love with yourself.\"

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line.\"

“Love yourself and dream bigger.”

and so on….

and you agree or not but …. Yes! the seeds of self-isolation, is sown in our sub-conscious mind.

But why things like this, hit our sub conscious mind at all?

One of the core reasons for this is, longing for acceptance from the society.

We are conditioned in such a way that we seek approval from people around us, even for our slightest act. We fall into the trap of peer pressure and it determines us what we should wear, how we should talk and even what we should think. And this goes on to the extent when our individuality as a whole is at a stake! We suppress our own need and want, and are governed by the people around us.

This continues to the extent we feel completely drained out, exhausted and to the extent of low self-confidence and self-esteem.

Mind is rebellious and loves extremity. It cannot trade-off for an in-between solution. Emotionally drained mind looks for the reasons to move from one extreme to another extreme.

From being in “Society is Everything” mode, you tend to enter “I Me Myself” mode.

Instead of valuing yourself, you become obsessed with you! So, you force yourself to accept that you are your “own hero”.

In a bid to heal your “wounded self”, you do not understand the difference between self-respect and selfish. And you fall into the vice of being selfish.

Self-love is the state of acceptance and appreciation of oneself and not being at the mercy of acceptance of people around. Being kind, patient, compassionate and mindful to yourself is required very much for physical, psychological and spiritual growth.

People around you are absolutely important to you, they are your core that is why they are around you. It is our love that we value them but not at the cost or loving one self, not at the cost of demeaning own self!